How to Keep Your Habits When Life Changes — Without Burning Out or Starting Over

You finally build a routine that works.

Then life happens.

A flu. A trip. A new job. A renovation. A move. A diagnosis. A child.

Does everything you’ve built fall apart?

Not necessarily.

If you’re willing to adapt your routines — and hold on to your identity — you can preserve the work you’ve done and stay grounded, even when life shifts.

Routines Help Us Run on Less

We don’t build routines just for the aesthetic. We build them to reduce decision fatigue. To save willpower. To keep the wheels turning.

But BJ Fogg said it best: we don’t live in a “habit vacuum.” Things change. We change. The world changes. So, how do we adjust our routines without losing ourselves?

Step 1: Accept the Shifts

Most of us spend a lot of energy resisting change. But change is the constant. The perfect routine you built for that season of life may not work for this one. That doesn’t mean you failed. It means you’re human.

Step 2: Identity Comes First

Your habits reflect your identity — who you are or want to be. So when things get chaotic, ask: What parts of my identity do I want to protect right now?

A couple examples:

• If I identify as someone who moves their body regularly, my gym schedule is a nice-to-have. But doing something active during the week? That’s a non-negotiable.

• If I’m a lifelong learner, reading two books a month might not happen during a business trip. But listening to a podcast or reflecting on what I’m learning through experience? Still doable.

Step 3: Match the Disruption to the Strategy

Let’s break this down by duration.

Short-term disruptions

Vacation, a cold, houseguests.

Options:

• Pause completely and return later. No guilt.

• Adjust slightly: swap gym for walking, home-cooked for mindful eating out.

• Protect at all costs: book hotels with gyms, plan meals ahead, schedule around workouts.

I’ve done all three.

When my husband and I were training for a marathon, we planned our vacation around the long runs. One of my favorite memories is an 18-mile scenic run from that trip. Sometimes the routine is the experience.

Long-term disruptions

Relocation. Illness. Extended travel. Home renovation.

Pausing forever won’t work. But replicating your old setup might not either. Here, you need creative tweaks.

This summer, my daughter and I are spending 6 weeks in Siberia. No gym. Different food. New rhythm. My habits will have to shift. But I don’t want to start from scratch when I return — so I’ll protect the essentials.

The goal? Keep the fire alive. If I can’t find firewood, I’ll use coal.

Permanent transitions

A diagnosis. A new country. A baby. A divorce. Retirement.

Here, you build something new.

• When my husband was diagnosed with diabetes, we couldn’t go back.

• When we immigrated, everything changed — language, stores, routines.

• When we became parents, nothing about our old system worked anymore.

These are the moments when we have to design new systems from scratch.

And again — we return to identity.

• “I’m someone who adapts to new cultures.”

• “I’m someone who thrives despite a chronic condition.”

• “I’m someone who stays grounded while raising a child.”

Let identity guide your new behaviors.

Final Thoughts

Routines aren’t rigid blueprints. They’re living systems. If they’re too rigid, they break when life changes. But when they’re flexible and identity-driven, they can bend without snapping. They can adapt. Shift. Recover.

And so can you.